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Submitted on
October 24, 2010
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She was conceived on the edge of a mirror,
lined with pretty white lace,
that burned the inside of her parents' nostrils.

She was born with a hole in her heart,
that the doctor's never noticed,
and no one bothered to fill.

She met Death on the playground,
when kindergarten was bending her bones.
Enticed by the glinting of his scythe,
as it preyed on a malformed baby rabbit.
She made a pinky promise with him,
swearing that she'd never forget his face.

He came and went,
swayed by corpse breaths
and east-coast winds,
but always leaving her alone.

He showed her how to hurt,
in the worst kind of way.
And each time,
he paid her a visit,
he'd take someone back with him.

She often asked where he would go,
when his curled claws would drag her mother,
her father,
her sister,
and every love she'd ever fallen for,
into the darkness that he crawled from.

All he'd say,
was that she'd find them again someday,
and that he would take her to them, personally.

But as February,
of her fourteenth year,
threatened to consume her whole,
burying her in the snowdrifts and icy winds
of its cavernous belly,
she saw him for the last time.

Without a second glance at her,
he swept her ink colored rabbit
into the crook of his scythe,
and turned his back on her.

For six years,
she waited,
for the promise he'd made.
To see all the ones she'd lost
to his bony grasp.

She had no friends,
no lovers,
no kin,
no pets,
only waiting,
alone,
for the day that he'd take her home.

As she withered into her twenties,
back breaking,
and hair graying,
not from age,
but from the weight of the world,
she began to lose hope.

He was all she'd ever known,
and now,
even he had left her alone.

She wept for him to take her,
as she slept in alleyways,
stained with his fingerprints.

She begged for him to find her,
as she fell on the steps of a church,
whose doors she couldn't approach.

She whimpered for him to save her,
as she stumbled,
heart cold,
and stomach hot,
to the edge of her iron-wrought balcony.

As the ice,
and the concrete,
gathered her into their embrace,
finally,
he came for her.

A twisted smile,
on torn and rotted lips,
and his scythe lined with frost,
and her blood.
He gathered her into his arms,
whispering that all was well,
as his cloak pulled darkness down to close her eyes.
Hmm...dunno if this makes sense.
Jus' a quick something. :shrug:
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Daily Deviation

Given 2014-02-19
:iconkoyhaert:
this piece was written with depth and feeling you could feel what the character felt and it was clear what was happening the disruption is magnificent!!!
this deviation definitely deserves the DD it has received

you understood the girls pain this shows the cruelty of reality and a promise.
definitely a work of art.

this is definitely a sad piece of writing and im Shure that's what the author was trying to portray .there are times when this actualy happens the figurative language gives it that professional touvh"

I can only say well done well written and I would be extremely surprised if this auther dosent aventualy get published
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
5 out of 5 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconwcninja11:
I am a huge fan of free verse, and I absolutely love it when someone writes something that I can relate to. Similar to Edgar Allan Poe, your descriptions are flawless. The whole piece has a certain flow to it, it's almost entirely......I believe the word I'm looking for is serene. You seem to have captured serenity in a darkness which is most often perceived as chaotic. Even when the reader is presented with something generally seen as morbid, like the malformed baby rabbit, it still holds that serenity, and captivates the reader even more. I would really like to see this particular storyline last even longer. In truth, I wasn't ready for it to end!
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
4 out of 4 deviants thought this was fair.

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:icononyxiusart:
OnyxiusART Feb 25, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh gosh I love this.
If you could explain the rabbit's meaning to me that would be great!
But wow, seriously, this is beyond beautiful.
Reply
:iconskye-42:
Skye-42 Feb 20, 2014  Student General Artist
Very nice to see such disturbingly beautiful poetry get a DD. Even if it was a 'quick something', it is a wonderful piece.
Congratulations on the DD. ^^ :clap:
Reply
:iconsoimstillunsure:
SoImStillUnsure Feb 22, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
:aww: Thank you! It's sure nice to see that some people still have a morbid appreciation for the dark and disturbing. I'm glad you liked it!
Reply
:iconskye-42:
Skye-42 Feb 22, 2014  Student General Artist
You're quite welcome. ^^ I like dark/morbid poetry and art, and even if I didn't, this was still beautifully written.
Reply
:iconsoimstillunsure:
SoImStillUnsure Feb 22, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks! :)
Reply
:iconshadowedacolyte:
"withered into her twenties" certainly has an illuminating characterization.
Reply
:iconsoimstillunsure:
SoImStillUnsure Feb 22, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I'm glad you enjoyed that line :)
Reply
:iconsilverinkblot:
SilverInkblot Feb 19, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I've always liked this poem; it's great to see it in the DD's today :D
Reply
:iconsoimstillunsure:
SoImStillUnsure Feb 22, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
:thanks: Thank you! I was sure surprised to see it there!
Reply
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